Note_20250613

13 June Place: HongKong Airport

I travel here. Today is Friday. I’m going to leave my job. My last day for work is 3rd July. I can feel that I am coming back natural life state. Yes, I reallllllllly think work is toxic.

I start to think about my personal possibility. I am very engaging in learning English which I think there are some reasons make my state recover. There are still some other reasons.

First, let me get away with boring, misleading state. I want to introduce a concept: thinking basement that is the beginning place of our thinking. Everyone’s thinking basement is different. But when an employee start to thinking, his mind absolutely is more relevant to his job, his owned and mastered skill. If you want to think differently, you must disconnect with your current environment. Work is so irritating, that makes it is hard to shun it. My isolated time is at most two days that is my weekend. In weekday, my mind have to connect with work again. After I commit my work-off offer, I don’t need to think about it. That’s different! I can save a lot of attention to look up some tools, other domain technologies, hacker news. That is my mind starts transforming. At the beginning, I feel misleading. I don’t know what I should do. I hope I can use my time effectively. That makes me very impatient.

15 June

我就要离开香港了，现在在机场。

一根波纹接连着一根波纹，我应该是要开始下一段落了。香港依然让我感觉压抑、烦躁，如此多的人在如此拥挤的房间，抬头望去尽是密密麻麻的高楼，地铁和路两边行人步履匆匆，商品和货物被紧密地摆放，如此多的人，我无法理解这里的人们如何生活。

换一个地方待一段时间确实会刷新我的状态，等待一段时间恢复，然后我会开始新的启程。我在6月13号晚上在机场看着窗外思考人生，也在酒店望着窗外发呆，现在在机场看着飞机飞过天空，祛魅的最好方式是拥有，我觉得体验也是。每一次新的经历都让我更平淡的看世界，不同地方的人并没有什么不同，他们都是一个个实实在在的人，都要为了生活而工作，养家糊口。网红追求美图，服务员提供良好的服务，老板们追求更高的利润，人并没有什么不同。换个环境让我放下了对当下的偏执，一个人在疲于遵守已设定好的生活路线和工作规范时，其实存在着一万种可能，只要他愿意打开自己的那扇窗户。

我依然热爱这个世界，我没有感觉到喜悦或是悲伤，不被自己的欲求控制，而又没有太多的活力，它可能只是需要一段时间来恢复，我写东西来记录我存在的这一刻，生活依然美好，即使充满着煎熬、焦虑和种种压力。我认为自己很擅长重复，在我看来，那很像是一种偷懒，而我又不喜欢一成不变，读万卷书和行万里路，知与行在交替进行，看起来我没有在跟他人对比，我跟过去的我相比。

回首望去依然欣慰，向前望去也充满信心。